Marriage Revealed
“Do all things without grumbling or disputing,” -Philippians 2:14 (ESV)
Lord open our minds and soften our hearts as we discuss this topic of marriage. Help us to set aside any & all hurts, disputes and complaints and come and sit in Your presence as we learn what Your word has to say. In Jesus name, Amen.
“So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.” -Genesis 1:27 (NKJV)
From the very beginning, God made men and women uniquely different, but at the same time complementary. These differences do not make men greater than women nor women greater than men. Throughout the creation account, at the end of each day, God declared His work good. At the end of day six, very good. But man by himself………? NOT good (Gen. 2:18)
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” -Genesis 2:24 (NKJV)
After God made the first woman and entrusted this remarkable gift to the first man, God instituted what we call marriage. Two persons becoming one new entity. One man and one woman forming the most fundamental human relationship in God’s created world, even more fundamental than parent-child. The two are to leave the covering of their parents' household and establish a new family unit together. Under God, she is now his most significant commitment. Under God, he is now her most significant commitment. As promising as it began, sin entered the world. It’s important to remember that we are a sinner united to another sinner and that God alone is what keeps us together and transforms us daily to ultimately glorify Him through our lives and our marriage. In this fallen and cursed world marriage is not without pains and difficulties.
“So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” -Matthew 19:6 (NKJV)
Even though sin has invaded God’s creation, and often husbands and wives find themselves struggling against each other, Jesus here strengthens God’s vision of marriage in creation. Sin may challenge, but it does not overturn God’s original design. Marriage is made to endure sin. God calls for the two to become one, not for the one to be torn apart into two.
“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” -Romans 5:8 (NKJV)
Love is a choice above an emotion. Our emotions fluctuate. One minute we are happy and content the next we are upset, indifferent and angry. God displays true love by extending His love for us despite our failures not based on emotion but rooted in Himself; true goodness and abiding grace.
“And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” -Ephesians 4:32 (NKJV)
Kindness is greatly underrated in marriages. Because of the wonderful boundaries and commitments of the covenant of marriage, husband and wife may feel the impulse and temptation to be harsh to each other, to lash out at that stubborn spouse who’s always there and seems to make life harder. In God’s vision for marriage, however, there is no place for cruelty or contempt between a husband and wife. Yes, loving correction. Yes, hard conversations. Yes, forgiveness requested and granted regularly, even daily. But never meanness. Husbands and wives who are in Christ know they are handled kindly by God every day. That doesn’t mean life together won’t be difficult, but all God’s appointed difficulties in the lives of His children are kindnesses, strange as they may seem, to grow us and draw us nearer to Him.
The Lord in His loving sovereignty has even given specific instructions to the man and woman and how they are to navigate marriage together.
“Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.” -Colossians 3:19 (NKJV)
Husbands LOVE your wives. As said before this has little to do with emotion, and much to do with self denial for the sake of another. It's defined as sacrificial, giving, absorbing, love. It is a love that loves even when rejected, gives without expecting repayment, and can be given to the unloving and unappealing. This love is the same love Jesus has for His people. Simply put, husbands continually practice self denial for the sake of your wife God has given to you.
“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.” -Colossians 3:18 (NKJV)
God’s call to a wife is to affirm, receive and nurture her husband's loving leadership in marriage. God calls for her to submit to her own husband, not all men. Her submission to him is not absolute, “as is fitting in the Lord.” Jesus Christ is her ultimate allegiance and authority, just as for her husband. As the husband is obedient to Christ, and self-sacrificial like Christ, they will thrive together in the dance of marriage as she affirms and strengthens him. The idea of submission doesn’t have anything to do with someone being smarter, better or more talented. It has to do with a God-appointed order. Godly submission is not passive or weak. It is a beautiful display of trust in authority, Jesus' entire life was one of submission to the Father. Submission is what we all do when we say Jesus is our Lord.
“This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.” -Ephesians 5:32 (NKJV)
When God says that marriage is a mystery, He’s saying it was a mystery for thousands of years, but now, with the life, death and resurrection of Jesus, marriage is no longer a mystery. The mystery has been revealed. From the beginning, God knew he would send his Son to save us from our sin, and he designed marriage to anticipate that.
The meaning of marriage is that Jesus has given His life for His people, His bride. The call of a husband — to lead by giving, and not taking — shows us Jesus, who did not protect Himself and His comfort, but sacrificed Himself for us. Jesus is the husband who does not claim special privilege, but shoulders more responsibility to love His bride with affection, allegiance, and action.
So be encouraged, whether you've been married for 5 minutes, 5 years or even 50 years to remember the tremendous blessing and weight of what marriage is in the eyes of God.
Lord open our minds and soften our hearts as we discuss this topic of marriage. Help us to set aside any & all hurts, disputes and complaints and come and sit in Your presence as we learn what Your word has to say. In Jesus name, Amen.
“So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.” -Genesis 1:27 (NKJV)
From the very beginning, God made men and women uniquely different, but at the same time complementary. These differences do not make men greater than women nor women greater than men. Throughout the creation account, at the end of each day, God declared His work good. At the end of day six, very good. But man by himself………? NOT good (Gen. 2:18)
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” -Genesis 2:24 (NKJV)
After God made the first woman and entrusted this remarkable gift to the first man, God instituted what we call marriage. Two persons becoming one new entity. One man and one woman forming the most fundamental human relationship in God’s created world, even more fundamental than parent-child. The two are to leave the covering of their parents' household and establish a new family unit together. Under God, she is now his most significant commitment. Under God, he is now her most significant commitment. As promising as it began, sin entered the world. It’s important to remember that we are a sinner united to another sinner and that God alone is what keeps us together and transforms us daily to ultimately glorify Him through our lives and our marriage. In this fallen and cursed world marriage is not without pains and difficulties.
“So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” -Matthew 19:6 (NKJV)
Even though sin has invaded God’s creation, and often husbands and wives find themselves struggling against each other, Jesus here strengthens God’s vision of marriage in creation. Sin may challenge, but it does not overturn God’s original design. Marriage is made to endure sin. God calls for the two to become one, not for the one to be torn apart into two.
“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” -Romans 5:8 (NKJV)
Love is a choice above an emotion. Our emotions fluctuate. One minute we are happy and content the next we are upset, indifferent and angry. God displays true love by extending His love for us despite our failures not based on emotion but rooted in Himself; true goodness and abiding grace.
“And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” -Ephesians 4:32 (NKJV)
Kindness is greatly underrated in marriages. Because of the wonderful boundaries and commitments of the covenant of marriage, husband and wife may feel the impulse and temptation to be harsh to each other, to lash out at that stubborn spouse who’s always there and seems to make life harder. In God’s vision for marriage, however, there is no place for cruelty or contempt between a husband and wife. Yes, loving correction. Yes, hard conversations. Yes, forgiveness requested and granted regularly, even daily. But never meanness. Husbands and wives who are in Christ know they are handled kindly by God every day. That doesn’t mean life together won’t be difficult, but all God’s appointed difficulties in the lives of His children are kindnesses, strange as they may seem, to grow us and draw us nearer to Him.
The Lord in His loving sovereignty has even given specific instructions to the man and woman and how they are to navigate marriage together.
“Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.” -Colossians 3:19 (NKJV)
Husbands LOVE your wives. As said before this has little to do with emotion, and much to do with self denial for the sake of another. It's defined as sacrificial, giving, absorbing, love. It is a love that loves even when rejected, gives without expecting repayment, and can be given to the unloving and unappealing. This love is the same love Jesus has for His people. Simply put, husbands continually practice self denial for the sake of your wife God has given to you.
“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.” -Colossians 3:18 (NKJV)
God’s call to a wife is to affirm, receive and nurture her husband's loving leadership in marriage. God calls for her to submit to her own husband, not all men. Her submission to him is not absolute, “as is fitting in the Lord.” Jesus Christ is her ultimate allegiance and authority, just as for her husband. As the husband is obedient to Christ, and self-sacrificial like Christ, they will thrive together in the dance of marriage as she affirms and strengthens him. The idea of submission doesn’t have anything to do with someone being smarter, better or more talented. It has to do with a God-appointed order. Godly submission is not passive or weak. It is a beautiful display of trust in authority, Jesus' entire life was one of submission to the Father. Submission is what we all do when we say Jesus is our Lord.
“This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.” -Ephesians 5:32 (NKJV)
When God says that marriage is a mystery, He’s saying it was a mystery for thousands of years, but now, with the life, death and resurrection of Jesus, marriage is no longer a mystery. The mystery has been revealed. From the beginning, God knew he would send his Son to save us from our sin, and he designed marriage to anticipate that.
The meaning of marriage is that Jesus has given His life for His people, His bride. The call of a husband — to lead by giving, and not taking — shows us Jesus, who did not protect Himself and His comfort, but sacrificed Himself for us. Jesus is the husband who does not claim special privilege, but shoulders more responsibility to love His bride with affection, allegiance, and action.
So be encouraged, whether you've been married for 5 minutes, 5 years or even 50 years to remember the tremendous blessing and weight of what marriage is in the eyes of God.
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